Hi it's Adewale here, the founder of stresstherapist.net…
And I'd like to ask you a little question…

What if there was one thing you could do to get rid of your fear of failure at work and in life instantly and forever?

would you like to know what this thing was? 

Well, the bad news...

As you might suspect, there are no instant fixes.And anyone who promises you this is just telling you lies.

But the good news is that I can offer you the next best thing right here, right now.

Adewale Ademuyiwa: Bsc Hons, Post Grad Cert, Dip He. Accredited by the British Association For Behavioural & Cognitive Psychotherapist

What if there was one thing you could do to get rid of your fear of failure at work and in life instantly and forever?

would you like to know what this thing was?

Well, the bad news...

As you might suspect, there are no instant fixes. And anyone who promises you this is really just telling you lies.

But the good news is that I can offer you the next best thing right here, right now.

The new scientific discovery

We live in a time of great knowledge. Where new scientific findings are opening up opportunities.

Many doors in mental health that were previously closed are now bursting open due to the miracle of neuroscience.

There is one particular scientific discovery everyone in the field of neuroscience is raving about right now.

This discovery revealed a mental trap that causes your brain to work against you.

This mental trap sets you up to fail at controlling your emotions when you need to feel calm and confident. It overloads you with anxiety, low mood and makes you angry with yourself . It can cause you to get so frustrated with life that you become snappy and negative all the time.

Here's an embarrassing personal experience I had with this mental trap.

I toiled for days with the thought of sharing this with you, but decided that it would give you a good insight into how devastating this insidious mental trap can get.

And I don't care if anyone thinks less of me for opening up about this to you.

Because my hope is that revealing this to you will help you take this mental trap seriously so that you too can achieve the kind of emotional freedom I and my clients have experienced.
‍

My frightening encounter with the Mental Trap

It was August 2001 and I had been preparing all night for an interview for a job I was already doing.

I’d been in this job as a locum community mental health nurse for the mental health team in Waltham Abbey, a small town just outside London. I had gotten to know the team members really well. And the team manager who seemed quite fond of me had already told me they were all rooting for me.

I fully expected to get into the interview room, answer all their questions and impress them all with my superior knowledge. I had my presentation perfect and thought this would be over soon.

But then standing in front of all my colleagues, our consultant threw me a curve ball. He asked a question about mental health law, which I didn’t expect.

And that’s when things fell apart.

My legs turned to jelly, my heart was racing and my throat went dry. I opened my mouth to speak, but nothing came out at first. After gaining a little composure, I began to stammer through what I knew was the answer to the question.

But as I opened my mouth to answer, I got bombarded by thoughts that they were all irritated with me. Like I was wasting their time.

You see, I wasn't so bothered about getting sacked. I knew I could get another job through the agency the next day if I wanted.

The problem, I later discovered, was that...

The mental trap I mentioned earlier, ambushed me in interlocking cycles that made it difficult for me to perform effectively during the interview.

This trap triggered an intense fear of negative judgement from my peers. Which tumbled into overwhelming anxiety. And the more my anxiety intensified the more I felt like I was being suffocated by a boa constrictor. And making a fool of myself at the same time.

I tried to continue answering the question, but I couldn't help but think…

These were people who knew me, people who I would still have to interact with day in day out if I got the Job. Now that they’ve seen this vulnerable side of me. I could swear they were thinking...

"How does this guy, who can't even get a hold of himself hope to succeed as a mental health nurse?"

To my surprise, I still got the job.

I was told it was a very close call and that the only reason they chose me was because my manager vouched for me based on my performance in the job itself.

Are you trapped too

Here's the truth...
‍
You have suffered at the hand of this mental trap if you can relate to any of the following.

• If you struggle to get out of bed to go to work daily. And you cannot enjoy your job even though the staff and manager are all right.
  
  Or you just can't generate the passion for work. You keep hopping from job to job because you lack interest. In addition, you don't get any joy from life outside work and all you want to do is hide away from everybody.
  
• If you struggle to relax and be calm around people. Particularly whenever you feel anxious and vulnerable or sweaty. You worry that people will judge you in a negative way which then makes you avoid public crowded places
  
• If you struggle with feeling of frustration, mood swings, temper difficulties, and a tendency to judge yourself negatively and compare yourself with others. Making you feel like you are not good enough.
  
  And this all puts you in a mental frame where you worry about things going wrong all the time
  

If you can relate to any of the above examples, then it is crucial that you take this mental trap seriously,

Why?

Because if you don't learn how to control your mental trap, It will surprise you by sabotaging you at unexpected moments. Moments when you need to focus and have a clear mind. Moments when you need to feel calm and confident.
‍
So it's crucial that you put in the time to learn how you can successfully bypass this mental trap so you can cope better emotionally.

I will explain how you can do exactly that in a moment.

But first...

How I succeeded at bypassing my mental trap

You see I used to struggle with the fear of people especially new people. The fear of looking silly because I didn't know how to start or maintain a conversation terrified me. And as such I would be that person in the party sitting at the corner of the room petrified of people talking to me.

But by the time I was working at the mental health team in Waltham Abbey, I believed that the problem was completely cracked.

Imagine my surprise when I had that embarrassing experience I narrated above. So I began to research to find out what caused me to trip up so badly and that's when I discovered neuroscientific studies around this insidious mental trap.

I began to learn about how this mental trap interrupts your ability to think and act rationally. I read about how the trap sabotages you emotionally and I discovered this mental trap has turned many people into hermits. They were too scared to leave their homes because they felt they'd lost all control over their emotions.

As such I began to develop coping strategies based on my findings on the mental trap. And I have used this as the core of therapy for myself and for my clients ever since.

The biggest tests for the validity of the strategies I discovered came in late 2004 when I was tasked to develop a specialized therapy group for people in the community in Waltham Abbey and Epping Forest. The program was aimed at people who struggled with depression, anxiety, stress, frustration and anger. People who were not coping well with the pressures in their life.

Some struggled to hold down a job because their anger got in the way. And others struggled to hold down their relationships because the anxiety and anger made them so snappy and irritable that they were difficult to be around.

With the help of my colleague Jane Walters who was the lead health visitor at Waltham Abbey at the time, we developed the program around neuro scientific concepts that helped people bypass their mental traps.

And the result...

We got reports of people managing to hold down their jobs. People managing to improve thier relationships. People no longer feeling guilty because they were no longer snapping at their kids.

Then came the big surprise...

News of the program spread and we got featured in A Mental Health Foundation magazine called The Boiling Pot. We got interviewed on BBC radio Essex.

And our program won both a local and national award for innovation in practice.

See the picture below ( I am the prominent black guy in the picture. They tell me I am so dark skinned I that I get lost in the shadows).

Here's me receiving an award with my friends from the Primary Care and Secondary Care Mental Health teams in North Essex UK.

The proof in the puddin

Any coping strategy worth is salt has to pass one crucial test...

It should pass the test of time.

The strategy shouldn't just work for a short period of time. It should work over and over again in a scientific way regardless of time factor. Once you have mastered the strategy, you should always be able to use it to switch your anxiety and your depression off whenever you need to.

Let me explain what I mean...

A few months ago, the strategies I developed  was put to the test.

I was asked to play piano for a particular audience full of professional musicians who I believed would spot the smallest mistakes. To avoid embarrassment and failure in front of this crowd, I practiced the piece for months, got it to a point where it was smooth and beautiful.

Then on that day I got to the hall, it was particularly full. There must have been about 250 people there.

They called me forward, I sat on the piano and... I drew a blank.

I couldn't remember my piece at all.

At the back of my mind I was smiling to myself thinking this is the old anxiety coming back to haunt me again, but because I knew how to deal with it. I took in a deep breath, I focused on the piano and decided to bluff my way through the piece.

I know how to play by ear so I just created something off the cuff. And I was able to hold my composure right through the whole experience.

To my surprise, people came to me afterwards telling me how wonderful the piece was. They expressed amazement that they didn't realize I could play so well. Honestly, I couldn't believe what I was hearing.

But what's my point for telling you this story?

This shows you how once you understand what's happening on the neuroscientific level, you can make progress in areas of your life where anxiety, depression or stress has previously held you back.

The missing information which no one else seems to talk about!

There are dozens of self-help books and blog posts showing you how to beat anxiety, depression, stress and low self-esteem problems. And many of them give you really good insights. Some even succeed at making you feel like they are talking to directly your situation.

But the truth...
‍
They have all told you a big fat lie.

What is that lie?

They make you believe that the only reason you struggle now is because of your personal weaknesses.

It's because of your lack of confidence...

It's because of your unstable moods...

It's because of your emotionally weak mind...

So, they convince you that the answer is to uproot all your weaknesses from your life.

To...
‍
“Stop being lazy.”

"Stop being so negative."

"Stop being so sad and boring."

" Stop worrying so much."

“Stop feeling sorry for yourself.”

But here's the real question...

How long have you been trying to become emotionally stronger like this? Have your efforts really worked?

The reality...

The more you try to cope by removing these weaknesses from your life, the stronger they latch on. Seriously, they become leaches.

That's because trying to cope by focusing on dysfunctional behaviors this way drops you right in the guts of the vicious mental trap I have been talking about.

Now here's the science that proves what I'm saying.
‍
You can Judge for yourself.

The scientific proof

According to E.Ron de Kloet (Academy professor of the Royal Netherlands Academy of Arts and Sciences) in his review article “stress and the brain: from adaptation to disease 2005,” at the base level of this mental trap, stress hormones act as a switch that controls adaptive behaviour.

You either adapt or break.

Kloet goes further suggesting that the more susceptible you are to the mental trap, the more likely you are to suffer stress-related brain diseases like depression, chronic anxiety, PTSD, social anxiety, agoraphobia, panic attacks, anger problems, etc.

Now the question is…

What determines if your stress hormones acts to support you, or act against you?

To help answer this, look no further than the humble electric switch in your home.

What happens when you flip the light switch? Obviously the light bulb turns on.

But as we all know, flipping the switch causes current to flow through a wire leading directly from the switch to the bulb.

Now imagine what happens if the wire leading to the bulb was all entangled with bare wires sticking out touching each other. The result of this would be sparks and blown fuses. In fact you could end up with the whole house going up in flames.

According to Kloet, our process of adapting to stressors in life, leads to a rewiring of our brain. And if this rewiring becomes an entangled mess, it causes automated biological responses and unwanted behavioural reactions. Responses like having a panic attack, becoming deeply distressed, experiencing deep low mood.

It's like your brain has blown a fuse.

Now the question is...

What types of adaptive behaviour to stressors in your life can lead to this bad rewiring of your brain?

What causes BAD Brain rewiring?

According to Dr Marsha Linehan, the pioneer of dialectical behavioral therapy...

Most life situations are full of paradoxes.

And as such any action taken to achieve good things can eventually result in bad outcomes. This is especially so if you are not aware of the need to keep everything you do in balance.

In essence, this just means that..

Doing too much of anything can cause you problems. No matter how good that thing is.

You see, as humans, we are prone to developing strategies to help us deal with life, protect ourselves from harm, and achieve success and enjoyment in our relationships and our careers.

Sadly, we take this to extremes without realizing it.

For example, Tamara has built up tenacity to keep pushing through tasks on her plate. She believes that this is important because not doing so would be lazy. And if she is lazy, she would be proving her mum right as mum always said she was lazy.

Whilst tenacity is a good strength to have, this led Tamara to work herself to the ground.  Sadly, she could not help but interpret her exhaustion as laziness. Causing her to beat herself up badly.

This is how the bad wiring in our brain occurs.And this is why I said your emotional struggle has got nothing to do with dysfunctional behaviour.  Because if you focus just on dysfunctional behaviour as the root of your problem, you will fall prey to this paradox of functional behaviours.

You simply won't see that your positive attempts to cope and function are the culprits.

This is exactly why I got sabotaged during my interview.

How to avoid your Mental Traps

Most people would conclude that I just had interview jitters, and that’s all.

But it goes farther than that.

You see, I discovered that the positive coping strategy that I adopted over the course of my life has been to be self-sufficient.

This was my strength.

Why?

Because it helped me protect myself from people who don’t care if they hurt you. The less I needed people, the less I could get hurt.

But in this interview situation, this strength of self-sufficiency became my weakness.

How?

I was in the best position to ask my colleagues for advice. They'd all been interviewed by the team before and this would have given me an advantage.

But instead, I did what I always do.

I did all my preparations on my own.

I didn’t even ask the consultant who I know would have been more than happy to give me pointers. And when he threw me that curve ball, it felt like a personal attack.

And once that happened, my emotional brain spiked like I had blown a fuse. I was overloaded with emotions. Then the embarrassment that I was a fumbling mess in front of my peers kept the electric sparks going.

This is the mental trap in full blown force. And the big problem is that this all happens on a subconscious level so you never see it coming until it crashes you.

You see, most people who are bombarded by overwhelming emotions would only focus their effort on stopping the emotional reaction because that’s the only thing they see as the problem.

Whereas in reality, it goes far deeper than that.

The bottom line is this...

Your mental trap is the misfiring of your mental wires which have become entangled because of many positive coping behaviours you have become accustomed to.

This is how your strengths, your positive attributes and your functional coping strategies become the same things that overload you with negative emotions.

This is why you are not coping.

And to begin to cope better emotionally, you’ve got to figure out which strengths are sabotaging you so that you can tone your reliance on them down.

This is the only way to bring balance back into your life and stop your strengths from dumping you in your mental trap every single time.

What other's are saying about avoiding their mental traps

Here's what Christian, one of my former clients had to say about how working on his strengths enabled him to start coping better emotionally.

This is the kind of result you can achieve from learning to tone your strengths down.

But, here's another crucial question…
‍
How do you figure out which of your strengths dump you into your mental traps?
‍
How do you know which strengths cause you to feel daunted and lose motivation and enthusiasm all the time? Which strengths destroy your confidence in your abilities?
‍
Which strengths make you fall into emotional traps where you lose the ability to think straight. Which strengths make you believe that you are not good enough for your job.

Which strengths make you believe that you are not a good enough mother, father, wife, husband....
‍
Which strengths make it feel impossible to get out of bed because you feel like an impostor at work.
‍
You probably haven’t thought about it right, you are just at the first stage of this process

But I will also be doing you a disservice if I didn’t bring these questions to your attention.

These questions are legitimate, and right now you may not have a real answer.
But I’d like to offer you an answer…

Here’s how you can turn your agonizing situations around for the better

If you are willing to do the work, I’d like to give you my one on one undivided attention and teach you everything I know about coping better, feeling resilient and feeling alive and happy. Even when you're under a dreadful amount of pressure.

Here's a Testimonial from a former client of mine, Aron, who worked as a department store manager:

So, having the knowledge you’ll gain from this emotional resilience coaching is an enormous advantage.

Just consider these issues for a second…

What do you do when you feel overwhelmed by everything...

When you feel drowned by what other people might consider to be small things... And you have to keep going to the toilet because when you get emotional you just lose it and end up crying very easily.

When you take everything very personally because you feel you will lose everything you have worked so hard for.

Well, here’s why I am telling you about this...

Here’s my Amazing offer to you

In the next 3 to 6 weeks…

I would like to help you learn emotional tools that enable you to build a future that feels more secure because you're no longer concerned that your anxiety will take over.

I would like to help you gain the ability to be confident and calm even when in unpredictable situations or when you are under real scrutiny.

And I will like to show you how to remain motivated and energized, especially when you feel pounded by uncontrollable problems .

As my client, you'll get six one-hour sessions where I guide you step by step to learn skills to cope successfully with problems that generally defeat you.

Problems you can't control which make you second guess yourself all the time.

You'll learn practical steps to stop the build-up of that horrible feeling of overwhelm.

Here's another feedback from another client who went through this same program I'll be taking you through.

Click play to listen to Donnette give her testimonial…

And if you think that’s a fluke here is another one.

Testimonial from another former client, Tessa, who was a starting out entrepreneur.

Now to be totally transparent…

The client's quoted above all worked tremendously hard to achieve what they did. But at the same time, I have dozens, maybe even hundreds of success stories like these.

And here’s the deal: I want you to become the next one.

I’d like to teach you everything I know. And…

If you complete my resilience building sessions, here’s what you’ll achieve...

You'll be able to stop worrying about what people think of you.

You'll no longer get anxious about not knowing answers, you'll feel confident enough to ask questions at work without fearing this would portray you as being weak.

And the wonderful result of this is that you'll no longer feel so exhausted with everything. And you’ll stop worrying about surviving through your day to day tasks at work.

Now don’t get me wrong, you can achieve these goals by yourself by scouring the web for self-help materials.

You can spend moths lumping different advice from experts together to achieve something that works for you. But it’s a hundred times harder.

But by completing my sessions, you save yourself months or even years of trial and error.

You save yourself from mistakes that will make your anxiety worse. And you save yourself from professional opportunists who are just waiting to pounce on you and take all your money, who then leave you feeling worse than when you started.

Instead with my program, I’ll hold you by the hand and guide you step-by-step through the complex concepts of coping successfully emotionally. So that you don’t get distracted and end up in the wrong direction.

This will save you lots of time wasting.

So, here’s exactly what your emotional resilience building sessions will look like

I will meet with you once a week for an hour-long session on Skype. And together, we'll go through each essential concept for coping emotionally and developing resilience.

These are neurological, psychological and stress management concepts that cater to low self-esteem which hides behind a mask of fake confidence. And concepts will be tailored to fit exactly with your personal situation.

The resilience building concepts will be broken down into easy to follow, practical format. This way, you know exactly what to do to get the results you want.

Then each week you will have the opportunity to email twice a week as you go through the strategies I teach you.

Once I receive your email I will respond back within 24 hours. This ensures that if you come across obstacles, we can iron them out properly before the next week's session.

So, as you can see, this is an intense programme calculated to ensure that you break through your struggles.

Here’s a quick walk-through what you'll learn over the six sessions we meet together...

The first thing you will learn is why most coping strategies don’t work (and I'll walk you through exactly what to do about it instead)

And you'll also discover the truth about effective stress management. You'll learn how to deal with your anxiety and train your mind to not overreact to things.

At this point, you'll be ready to understand the crucial mindset shift that can do more for you than 3 years of therapy.

But that's not all, you'll also learn...

The concepts we will cover will help you understand what NEVER to do when your work requires you to push yourself beyond your stress levels repeatedly. So that you don't keep pushing yourself to break down.

Then we will uncover the secret to feeling motivated, enthusiastic and happy about your tasks and expectations at work. This will help increase your confidence in yourself and your abilities. 

At this point, I will review an amazing 5-step flipped stress cycle that will eradicate indecisiveness, fatigue and poor motivation.

Then you'll discover the easiest way to train your mind to not overreact to things and develop inner peace and calm— even if you've never been able to meditate before. 

And then we will go through the BEST way to prevent a relapse of your emotional difficulties. So, you never ever make mistakes that plummet you back to square one again.

But wait! there's more...

Even more Exciting stuff added for you!

Not only do you get all the great service listed above…
If you purchase my emotional resilience package today, once you've finished your six sessions…

You also get a two-month free pass to our exclusive members only program which consists of access to more tutorial materials on coping successfully emotionally.

And as part of the members only program, you get access to a total of four group coaching calls. Giving you the chance to ask questions or simply listen and learn as I uncover the best strategies for different emotional difficulties like high functioning anxiety and high functioning depression.

This guarantees you are not left on your own to deal with the obstacles you might encounter as you master the strategies you learn during your one to one sessions.

Essentially, this program really puts you in the best position ever to become emotionally stronger.

Now what’s all that worth?

And here’s all you pay for this staggering deal!

Well, let's say you go the traditional route paying an expert to help you learn to cope better emotionally. They will charge you anything from £100 to £300 per one-hour session.

Which means you could be paying a total of £600 to £1800 for six sessions.

But remember…

You are not allowed to contact your Coach or therapist in between these sessions. Plus, once the six sessions are over, you’ve got to shed out even more cash for any extra assistance. This is just the way the system is rigged to suck money from your pocket.

But what's more…

You are forced to bear all the risk alone. If your therapy/ coaching sessions fail to work, you're forced to carry all the blame for failing.You are made to feel like It’s your fault that the strategies didn’t work.

You're told...
"You just didn’t do the work effectively enough to achieve your goals. "

And believe me, this can be a pain to hear, when you know you've worked your socks off.

Because, that's way too much money to shell out only to feel worse than when you started out.

To be honest, this is not fair on you at all.

And that's why I'm going to make this as fair as possible for you. I want to ensure you’ll bare no risks whatsoever.

So, Included in this packaged deal! You get...

6 hours of one to one sessions of emotional resilience building (Worth £1,800)

12 free email consultations (Worth £300)

2-months access to our exclusive [TBC] members-only service (£98)

4 resilience building group coaching calls (Worth £250)

Altogether worth a total of £2,448

But, I’m NOT going to charge you anything over £2000. I am not even going to charge you anything above £1000.

The price today, for everything we just talked about, is just…

4 payments of £199

But, hurry…

Because this is an intense one to one program...

 I can only take 30 people at a go, so you might have to wait months to get in on this deal again.

Plus, I am not sure, how long I’ll be able to keep the program at this price. So, this may be your last chance to get this massive deal at such low price.

But, just in case you are still sitting on the fence...

Here’s the best thing about this deal yet.

My jaw-dropping money back guarantee!

I’ve got a sparkling 100% money back guarantee for you…

If for any reason you are dissatisfied, just send me an email within 90 days from your first one to one session with me, and I’ll give you an immediate 100% refund.

You don’t have to explain why you want out or give me any justification whatsoever. You can just drop the program and we’ll refund 100% of your payment…

And I’ll wish you the best of luck, no hard feelings at all.

You bear no risks whatsoever

This is to show you the commitment I have to making my program work for you. Plus, I believe that it’s only fair. You shouldn’t have to carry any risk whatsoever in this. Life is tough enough as it is.

But, I don’t think that’s going to happen.

When you go through our materials, and you begin to feel confident at work even when in unpredictable situations and you no longer experience that every day morning dread of going to work…

My guess is you feel like you’ve made the best investment of your life.

If you are ready for that, click the buy now button below or choose the "pay in instalments" option.

Or if not? Hey, that’s totally fine. You can give this a try all on your own. You just want to have the benefit of our tried and tested training walking you through how to do it right.

Either way, I sincerely wish you the best, and I’ll be in touch with