Healing your shame through compassion script 1

You were born with the innate ability to heal. It’s who you are. It’s your natural state. But it’s easy to forget that. You may feel ashamed of who you are, of the way you act, or of the decisions you make.

When you feel ashamed of yourself, you often shut down and become stuck. You feel isolated and disconnected from the world. This makes it even more difficult to feel safe.

Mindfulness can help you find the energy and capacity to break free from these patterns. You will learn to live with your natural state and discover a greater sense of self-love.

Start by focusing on your breath and inviting in the breath as many times as necessary.

As you breathe in and out, see if you can stay present with the experience of the breath. Breathing in and breathing out are natural. There is no reason to fight them.

Bring your attention to the body. You can focus on the chest, abdomen, or nostrils.

Focus your attention on your physical sensations. What do you feel? Where do you feel it? Is it pleasant or unpleasant?

Ask yourself what brings you pleasure and joy. It may be a physical sensation, like the feeling of warmth in your hands, or it may be a quality, like the comfort of a hug.

For the next minute, be with whatever brings you joy. Simply bring your attention to the pleasurable experience and the sense of peace you feel.

Bring your attention back to the breath, to your body, and to your mind. Bring your awareness to the breath for a few minutes, noticing how it feels to be in your body and in your mind.

Breathe deeply and gently for a few minutes. Open your eyes when ready.

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Healing your shame by lifting your eyes script 2

When you feel ashamed, you believe that what is going on in the world around you is somehow your fault. Shame is experienced as something bad about yourself.

With shame, you feel that you should change who you are. When you are ashamed, you think you need to become someone else in order to fit into society.

But you are not the problem. Shame is a problem within you. In this practice, you can learn to lift your eyes and recognize that you are not who you think you are. You are actually quite amazing.

Lifting your eyes is a simple practice that allows you to look at yourself with a more kind and accepting perspective. When you feel ashamed, try this practice for a few minutes.

Find a comfortable posture in which to sit. Rest your hands in your lap and close your eyes. Breathe deeply for a few breaths to settle in.

Bring to mind a time when you felt ashamed of some aspect of your life, body, or beliefs. Really bring it to mind. You may have experienced shame for your weight, your job, your relationship, or something else.

Think about the experience of shame you had, and bring it to mind as vividly as possible.

Imagine that the shame you experienced is a ball sitting in your belly. It might be a small ball or a big ball. Just see it and feel it.

Ask yourself: Is this ball my shame? Or is this ball something else? What is it?

You may have a hard time answering this question. It’s natural that you can’t always see it clearly. When you start practicing, it may take a lot of work to get the answer. But keep working at it, and you will soon discover that you are not your shame.

Instead, you are a beautiful and kind soul who happens to carry some shame.

Continue to bring your awareness to the shame. Notice if you are thinking of the shame itself, or if you are thinking of yourself. See if you can notice how this thought is separate from your true identity.

After a few minutes, notice the thoughts arising in your mind, and acknowledge them. Then turn your attention to your body, the breath, and the experience of being alive.

If the thought arises that you have to fix the shame, ask yourself: Am I willing to fix it? Is it possible for me to fix this? Can I really make this happen?

Open your eyes and move your attention to something outside the body. Look at the sky, the ground, a tree, or some part of the environment.

Notice that the sky is always present. It has been always present, even when you have felt shame. You can experience this as a kind of truth.

There is only one thing you can ever truly change. You can change your thoughts. The sky cannot be changed. So you can choose to change your thoughts or you can choose to accept the reality of your situation.

With this understanding, you can find a way to lift your eyes and move out of shame.

Healing your shame script 3

Shame is the most painful feeling that people can feel. It is rooted in the egoic self. The ego is the small self that controls your experience and is concerned with self-preservation.

Because we are so invested in self-survival, the ego often believes it is the center of reality. This perception leads the ego to feel shameful and unworthy.

In addition, the ego has been shaped by the culture in which we live. We are conditioned to believe that we are weak, inferior, and unworthy. Shame arises when these feelings are activated.

With mindfulness, we can explore the ways in which we create shame in ourselves and others. Through compassion, we can connect with our deep desire for safety and self-preservation.

Find a comfortable meditation posture and invite gentleness into the body from the beginning.

Notice any tension or discomfort in the body and soften around it.

Bring to mind somebody you feel ashamed of. Notice why this feels shameful.

You may find it helpful to connect with phrases of self-compassion:

I am ashamed of myself. I am so afraid that I will be punished for this. I am sorry for what I have done to myself.

Connect with the intention to cultivate a compassionate heart. If there is resistance, notice its presence without pushing it away. It takes time to open the heart, so don’t force anything.

Begin offering phrases of self-compassion, connecting with the words as much as you are able. Use these phrases: I am ashamed of myself. I am sorry for what I have done to myself.

May I find safety in the knowing that I am not alone. May I be able to forgive myself. After six or seven minutes of offering self-compassion, let go of these phrases.

Turn toward yourself, noticing that you, too, have created shame. You don’t need to engage in stories about the shame you have created.

Just recognize that you have indeed created this suffering, whether you intended to or not. Call to mind a specific situation in which you have created shame. Begin asking for forgiveness from this person, using these phrases: I ask for forgiveness for any harm I have caused you.

May you find space in your heart to forgive me. May you forgive one another. Allow five minutes to pass, and return to your own body.

Breathe deeply for a few minutes, resting your awareness on the breath before opening your eyes.

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